Retirrment

Today Dy Zonal Head Rup Shankar Bhattacharua gave a fantastic expression of thoughts, during the farewell function of AGM RO Bengaluru NK Ramachandran, which were like an unbriddled flow of tap water. The spontaneous assimilation of thoughts coupled with humorous anecdotes left the listeners spell bound. The audience were awestuck and there was laugh riot all over. It is the irony of our Bank that such speakers are laying down their good offices shortly in the Bank without due recognition. 
Rup Shonkor Babu, Aaj ke aapnaar fan following ta bede gaalo.K S.Venkatesh Chief Manager HRMD FGMO  BANGALURU

Meaning

Meaning

Singing

My wife one day asked me:-

MY Wife:
Whenever I Sing Classical, why do you stand in the Balcony...?

ME
To ensure that our neighbours don't think I'm Beating you...!!!

😝😂

MANAGER LESSON PART II

Only a few days back, I was fortunate enough to have been invited by a reputed Management Institute on penultimate day to address a group of senior officers of various organisations participating in some Executive development programme on the topic Present day Leadership as is prevailing in our country.Aftre a thread bare discussion with the concerned course coordinator to understand as to what they expect of me to deliver, I prepared the paper in an allegorical and circustic manner which is now reproduced below:----
                                                                  Title -- Dare to dream beyond GEETA, KORAN, BUBBLE or any other Holy books to be a successful practical Leader
1.Be a begger:-- Temples, Mosques,churches etc are all divine places where the poor beg outside and the affluent beg inside.Similarly your organisation is a divine place and if you are a top senior level officers beg confidentially from those persons who matter and enjoy the begging of middle and junior level officers openly from them.Sometimes throw them some alms but never satisfy them fully.
2.Enjoy power while in chair:-This is a hard reality and a universal fact.In a wedding ceremony,the groom follows the procession ahead of him while in the final journey to the eternity,the funeral procession follows the corpse.Every body wants to be the centre of attraction even in a funeral procession.In order to be the centre of attraction,one  can act as another corpse in a separate cot till you reach the cremation/burial ground.In any case the  intention is to steal the limelight from others.

3,Be simple:-Atleast pretend to be loyal to the authority that might be.A successful leader now a days never forgets to light up candle in Memory of the death anniversary of the father of his boss and make it a point to bring it to his notice.
Similarly,the birth day of your juniors be celebrated by blowing of candles(opposite action) and cutting cake.you will be considered as leader of the grassroot level workers.By this method, a true leader can have his bread buttered on either side.one may not be loyal to his organisation but should be loyal to one individual subject to change of preferences fro time to time.
4.Pretend to be the photograph :-This modern philosophy can be explained by an exampl. A nail in the wall bears the maximum load during the life time of his master.Even after his death, a photo of his master is hung on the wall and people praise the man in the photo and not the nail Act like a photograph and at time of your departure,pass on this mantra to your successor if by any chance he does not know it.
5 Be indispensable and not valuable:--A flower bouquet may cost Rs1000 but it generally finds place in the feet and then to waste paper box.But a Bindi may cost only Rs 2 but finds its place on the forehead.Try to be a Bindi rather than to be a flower bouquet.
6 Be harsh with your juniors in communications:--The history is the testimony to the fact that no insects come nearer to Neem leaves as it is bitter in taste but sugar attracts ants daily.Take precautions to avoid the string of ants But if you want to get any work done,please be sweet to others.Similarly when some senior speaks sweet to you,please be sure there is a motive behind it
7Never give value judgement but practice it wherever possible:-No body likes honest critism.No body likes to go in a straight road but loves to walk through serpentine lane.This is precisely the reason no body asks an alcohol dealer to supply a bottle a day to the house..Instead they purchase it from the shop as per the requirement.But in case of milk, they ask the milk vendor to supply it daily to their respective houses. But in case of milk dealer ,they  always cast an aspersion as to how much water is adulterated while in case of alcohol, they(consumer)themselves mix water.why this Paradoxical behaviour?Hence no value judgement but take maximum benefit from who is ready to oblige without making him to understand.
8. Divide and rule:---The GEETA ,KORAN,BIBLE and all holy books remain in the same library but they never quarrel among themselves.Those who quarrel in the name of those books have never read it but still engage themselves in bloody fight at the instances of some vested interest.The present day leader should imbibe this attributes as a catalyst and ensure smooth administration.
9.No regrets about the past:-A successful leader of modern day never thinks about the past as past is only for reference and not residence..
10.Be selfish :-It is not being selfish to love youself,take care of yourself and to take all steps to make yourself happy and prosperous even it means cheating your dear relatives brothers sisters etc.
11.Never Trust:-- Don't trust any body because people change  but memories never.And even the changed person will deny his change with a solid and crisps No.Again while talking to some body over your mobile and you donot want to disclose

ADVISE

WITHOUT MALICE TO ALL AND NONE-----SELF RETROSPECTION ONLY.

We are all Learned without Learning.We have never fought even a single battle yet We consider ourselves to be a great Fighter.We pretend ourselves to be civilised and a true patriot by Proxy.We are courteous, intelligent beyond any proportion.We are not crazy about any thing.We can pass any examination,earn our livelihoods  and Smoke too.
We will never lead but follow to criticise only the poor man who wants  to show and take us to  the right path .WE NEVER WORK BUT EAGER TO EXTEND OUR ADVICE EVEN IF UNSOLICITED.

INSANE

Once a psychiatrist asked a patient as to how he turned insane all on a sudden.The patient replied very cooly that it was  because of turn of  various events in my life.I married a widow who had a girl of 20years out of her earlier wedlock.My father married that young daughter.So technically my daughter became my mother and I became the father in law of my father.They gave birth to a daughter and  she became my sister by relation but I am the husband of her grand mother too.So from that side she became my grand daughter.
Now we had a son out of our wedlock.so my son became the brother in law of my father and I became the maternal nephew of my son.
The doctor could not bear any more and shouted at him"please stop all these rubbish.That idiot will make me mad too"

RESULT AND NOT THE EFFORT THAT MATTERS

On a particular day one priest and a bus driver expired at the same time by coincidence.Both of them were taken to the to the common entrance of the hell and heaven and after due scrutiny both of them were asked to again wait in a queue for entry to the heaven.
The office assistant was having three types of robes ;one made of gold,one made of silver and a general robe to be given to the new entrants according to their status like first class,second class and ordinary class depending upon their deeds while alive.
The priest saw the driver was standing in front of him whom he knew very well for abusive mouth, loutish and rough behaviour apart from being under the impression of the cheap Alcohol all the time.The priest failed to understand how he could get entry to heaven but was sure that he would be given a general robe granting general status.
However to his dismay,the priest found that the loud mouth driver was given a gold robe while the priest was given a general robe-- not even a silver robe.The priest became very agitated and complained to the GOD saying my lord during my life time ,I had been chanting your names from morning till dead of night but that driver was the most uncivilised man ,abusive  and used to remain always drunk.while I got a general status,the wicked bus driver was given the most coveted first class status.There seems to be gross injustice my lord.
The God replied yes I agree to what you say but what was the result! Very few used to attend to you and even those persons used to engage themselves on their personal discussion without listening to you let alone chanting my name
On the other hand the bus driver who used to ply bus between uddupi Man galore route used to drive the vehicle being fully drunk in a lightening speed and the bus full of passengers used to shout my name aloud till they reach their destination.Now you tell me whose contribution is more.I am interested not in the means but with the end only.
Moral of the story:-
It is not your effort that counts but it is your result that is what is taken in to consideration.