All you want

1.what are the qualities you want to have with your life partner?
2.I have not thought as such on this matter. But still I am given to understand that Brazilians are having a great heart while the Bengalis are very romantic!
3.Oh great By the by Do you know my name!
4.No What is your name?
5.Ronaldo Banerjee

Marketing strategy

Panchuda of our locality is the owner of a shop dealing in stationery goods.He is extremely popular among his customers because of his innovative usp.He never returns his customer even if the item sought for is not readily available in his stock. He would give the customer something substitute of the item with a polite rsauest to manage that day with the substitute and a firm assurance to make the original item available on the next day.in the process the customer is happy while patchu da expands his business  activities to his satisfaction.
One day during the lunch time, panchu before going to his house to have his lunch askes his employee to manage till he comes back and not to return any customer in the meantime.
After few minutes, a customer appears and has asked for a roll of tissue papers. The employee informs him that tissue paper is not presently available and offers  him  some sand papers to manage for the day while tissue paper would be made available on the next day.

Truth is stranger than fiction

ALMOST  A  FACT

✨Mental Venky

Venkat went  to a bank to open a S.B.  A/C.
After seeing the Form he went to Delhi for filling it up.
You know why?
Form said: 'Fill Up In Capital.'
😀   
Venkat standing below a tube light with open mouth.
Why?
Because his doctor advised him: 'Today's dinner should be light !'
😃
On romantic date Venkat  gf asks him:
'Darling ! On our engagement will you give me a ring?'
He said: 'Sure ! What's your phone no.?'
😀
Venkat found the answer to the most difficult question ever.
What will come first, chicken or egg?
what ever u order first will come first.
😀
Teacher told all students to write an essay on a cricket match.
All were busy writing except Venkat
He wrote:'Due To Rain, No Match!'
😀
What does Venkat  do after taking a Xerox?
He will compare it with the original for any spelling mistakes.
😀
Venkat& wife buy coffee in a shop.
Venkat: Drink quickly before it gets cold.
Wife: Why?
Venkat: Hot coffee $5 and cold coffee $10.
😀

Manager asked Venkat  at an interview.
Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?
Venkat replyed: -P-O-S-T-B-O-X.
😃

After returning back from a foreign trip, Venkat  asked his wife,
Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Venkat: In London a lady asked me Are you a foreigner?
😁😉

Lecturer: write a note on Gandhi Jayanthi
Venkat writes, "Gandhi was a great man, but I don't know who is Jayanthi.
😖😠

Interviewer: just imagine you are on the3rd floor, it caught fire
and how will you escape?
Venkat: its simple. I will stop my imagination!!!
😝😜✌

Venkat: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre girl: sir, just dial 123to know current bill status
Venkat: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.
🙌👉😝😁

Friend: I got a brand new Ford IKON for my wife!
Venkat: Wow!!! That's an unbelievable exchange offer!!!
😘😍

Teacher: "What is common between JESUS, KRISHNA , RAM, GANDHI and BUDHA?"
Venkat : "All are born on government holidays...!!!
😭😂✨

Sir: What is difference between Orange and Apple?
Venkat : Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE
👏✋😜😝.😂😂😂😉😜.                                How come Venkat replaced Santa/Banta?

Bitter Truth

If Columbus wold have been married to a Bengali lady, he would not have been successful to discover  America. Because his wife wold invariably have shot the following volley of questions:-
Where are you going?
With whom you are going?
How are you going?
What are you going to discover?
When do you come back?
How long will it take and why?
Can you not discover it here?
What will happen if you don't discover?
Why are you always interested to discover?
No other person is there to drive the wild buffaloes by taking meal from his own house?
What shall I do here alone?
Will you have lot of friends with you No?
And there will be a fountain of alcohol to be gulped by all of you No?
OK come back home I will teach you a good lesson!
Colombus:- Leave it I AM NOT GOING😁😂😀

Amazing english

Once Iswarchandra Vidyasagar asked Michael Madhusudan,
Can you make a full paragraph without the letter "E"?

Michael Madhusudan answered,

"I doubt I can. It’s a major part of many, many words. Omitting it is as hard as making muffins without flour.  It’s as hard as spitting without saliva, napping without a pillow, driving a train without tracks, sailing to Russia without a boat, washing your hands without soap, or shitting without a butt. And, anyway, what would I gain? An award? A cash bonus? Bragging rights?  Why should I strain my brain? It’s not worth doing."