TIT FOR TAT

A very busy doctor married an ordinary girl.
The wife naturally wanted more attention and time from her husband but the doctor failed to fulfil her desires for obvious reasons.
One day while the doctor was leaving for the hospital hurriedly early in the morning, the wife asked her husband to put the lock of the main gate in right shape which was not working properly.
The doctor became very angry and asked his wife if she considered him as a black smith.
Again on some other day, the wife again asked her husband to set right the cistern which was not working properly and the doctor husband again ridiculed his wife stating that he was not a plumber by profession.
Again after few days she requested her husband to bring two flower pots  for her  so that she could keep them on the balcony  and the the doctor again refused to do so saying he was not a gardener.
One day after returning the home in the night, the doctor found a new lock on the door, a new flash in the toilet and two flower pots  on the balcony.He asked if his wife could engage a person to put all these things in right place and shape!
The wife said nopes! "It had been done by Bibhu,the elder son of land lord but against one condition". The doctor became curious and wanted to know the condition. The wife said Bibhu wanted to have a chicken fry or a  day out with her for datinng.The doctor cum husband hurriedly wanted to know if his wife had treated Bibhu with the chicken fry!
The wife cooly asked him if he considered her as waitress of KFC!

TRUTH IS STRANGER THAN FICTION

Turning the pages of History.
Though train tracks  were laid much before 1909,there did not exist any toilet in any of the  bogies of passenger or express trains.
Sometimes in the year of 1908,a train came and halted at a station Called Ahmedpur in Birbhum district West bengal.
One Bengali gentleman  sri Okhil Chandra Sen had to go the platform enclosed toilet to attend to the nature's call. While easing himself, he heard the whistle of the train indicating departure from the station. Somehow he came out of the toilet holding the lota ( spherical ware vessel made of copper or aluminium)in one hand and the edge  of  dhooti on the other and started running towards the train which by then was leaving the station slowly.He even signalled the guard to stop the train but the guard did not pay heed  to his request and in his bid to board the train, he overturned on the platform in an awkward position. Having been felt insulted, he left the station and subsequently wrote a letter of complaint
to the authority in the year of 1909 that  it
was  necessart  for making arrangements of  a toilet in the train for convenience of the passengers.He stated that his stomach was highly overcast coupled with matching bolts and lightening due to overeating of jackfruits the previous night that made him compelled to go to the station enclosed toilet but the guard was heartless not to take his genuine problem in consideration and waived at the train to leave the station leaving him in lurch. The same letter is still kept in the Delhi Railway museum and the Britishers took immediate  steps to introduce the toilet in the trains.
Please salute that Bengali gentleman if you happen to use the toilet now even during your train journey.
The letter in original.....
A letter  which  created history*
Date: 02 - 07 - 1909
Divisional Railway Officer,
Sahibgunj,

Respected Sirs,
I am arrive by passenger train Ahmedpur station and my belly is too much swelling with jackfruit. I am therefore went to privy. Just I doing the nuisance that guard making whistle blow or train to go off and I am running with lotaah in one hand and dhoti in the next when I am fall over and expose all my shocking to man and female women on platform. I am got  at Ahmedpur station. This too much bad, if passenger go to make dung that dam guard not wait train five minutes for him. I am therefore pray your honour to make big fine on that guard for public sake. Otherwise I am making big report to papers.(ORIGINAL LETTER)

Your faithful Servant,
Okhil Chandra Sen

(THIS IS A TRUE INCIDENT)

Sensational sense beyond sixth sense

A blind man in a restaurant and asked for a menu card  in braille  script

Manager -sorry Sir ??

Man - I'm blind ....ok, just bring me ur kitchen spoon, I'll smell it & order.

Manager got a spoon
Blind man smelt & said "Yes, I'll have garlic bread with seasoned potatoes...

"Unbelievable" said the manager...

Every week he came & was correct each time.

Once manager wanted to trick him, He went to the kitchen and told his wife
"Rub this spoon on ur lips". She rubs it on her lips and gives it to her hubby...

Blind man smelt & said,
"Oh ! My God......!!
My old friend  Tuntuni   also works here!!

Manager  suffered  a serious  heart attack

Reunion special

Have you ever been guilty of looking at others of your owvn age and thinking, "surely I can't look that old.". Well . . . you'll love this one..The stuff is from my own very recent  experience. I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new advocate.

I noticed her LLB degree on the wall, which bore her full name.

Suddenly, I remembered,a tall , very  pretty girl with a lock of dark-hair up-to her waist with the same name had been in my high school class some 40--45-odd years ago.

Could she be the same girl that I had a secret crush on, way back then?

Upon seeing her,  however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired lady with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate.

After she examined my case, I asked her if she had attended St Xavier's collage  Kolkata!

"Yes. yes, I did.' she gleamed with pride.

"When did you graduate?" I asked.
She answered, "In 1977. Why do you ask?"

"You were in my class!!!!", I exclaimed.
Shee looked at me closely.

Then,
that
ugly,
old,
bald,
wrinkled faced,
gray-haired,
decrepit,
idiot lady
asked,

"What subject did you teach" ?" 😍😍😍😛😛😛😜😜😜

DEFINITION OF MATERIALISM"

A very successful attorney parked his brand new Porsche 911 Turbo in front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he was getting out, a truck came barreling down the road, drifted right and completely tore off the driver's door. Fortunately, a cop was close enough to see the accident and pulled up behind the now door-less Porsche with his lights flashing.

Before the cop had a chance to ask any questions, the attorney started screaming hysterically about how his precious Porsche, which he had just purchased the day before, was completely ruined and no matter how any car body shop tried to make it new again, would never be the same. And that being an attorney, he was going to sue the truck driver, his employer and even his drivers education teacher!

After the lawyer finally wound down from his rant, the cop shook his head in disbelief, "I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are!" he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you neglect the most important things in life."

"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.

The cop replied, "Don't you even realize that your left arm is missing? It was severed when the truck hit you!"

"OH, MY GOODNESS!" screamed the lawyer. . . "My Rolex!"

PARADOXES OF LIFE

The man who has to walk through the rain to hide his tears,suppress his sadness beneath his choked throat,travel in a crowded bus with high fever and in a state of dilirium at any cost  but without a seat to prove his masculinity,is also a human being like others.He may have to spend countless days in the police lock up along with other criminals on an alleged  charge of outraging the modesty of a female just on the basis of a complaint but without any evidence or prior investigation under the guise of a  highly biased law or may be subjected to venomous taunts by his wife for his incompetence of  not being able to satisfy the greed over the need and ultimately becomes a patient of depression.The society makes  fun of his sentiments, he is termed as hen pecked in case he gives equal status to his wife,may be termed as un smart if he is gentle and law abiding and again the same person is termed as bad in case he becomes unruly.
But the society fails to recognise that he is equally defeated and deprived like any other females.But above all he is a man and man only and his sorrows sufferings have to be  evaporated  just like inhaling the smoke of cigarette after cigarettes.The society will become adult only when the bad or good will depend not on genders but on its motives.Let all the die hard fans of feminists understand that as  all females  are not the symbol of goddess Durga,all men are not like Baba Ramrahim but there are persons who are like Barun Biswas  too. If at all it happens ,then that day may be celebrated as international men's day like international women's day.
Happy international men's day
Be not just a man or a woman ,but a human......